The *New* New Normal

Oh, happy day—I woke up this morning feeling totally back to normal. I also woke up NOT feeling as though a bomb went off in my head, thanks to having cut my Zyprexa dose in half. Only one more week and I’ll be off entirely. Hurray!

Even better, I haven’t put on anywhere near as much weight as I expected, considering how much I’ve been eating lately. The last time I was on Vitamin Z, I gained 25 lbs. within the first month; this time, I’m taking twice as much and have put on only THREE pounds. Which is like a $20 increase in my tax bill.

I was so surprised that I weighed myself twice on each of the “cattle scales” at work, fully loaded with nursey stuff in my scrub pockets and heavy walking shoes on, which probably added at least four or five pounds. I even jumped up and down a couple of times to make absolutely certain that the scales weren’t lying to me…..and they wouldn’t budge.

Well, whaddaya know? It’s not that I don’t already have a lot to worry about with my weight; I’ve lost a little over sixty pounds in the past year, but am still dangerously overweight and I was terrified of gaining back a bunch of it on the Z. However, sanity is a bit more important than body size, and when I get as bad as I did with this manic episode, Zyprexa is the only thing that really works.

The other piece of good news is that my blood sugar is in the normal ranges. I checked a random finger-stick this morning, and all was well. My diabetes has been under excellent control since I lost the sixty pounds, and I really didn’t want it to go apeshit again, like it did the last time I took Z. Who knows……I’ve only been on it for 2 1/2 weeks and have a week to go, and it looks like I just might escape relatively unscathed.

Keeping fingers, toes, and eyes crossed, even as I lick the frosting off a cupcake I don’t need. Heh.





Published by bpnurse

I'm a retired registered nurse and writer who also happens to be street-rat crazy, if the DSM-IV.....oops, 5---is to be believed. I was diagnosed with bipolar I disorder at the age of 55, and am still sorting through the ashes of the flaming garbage pile that my life had become. Here, I'll share the lumps and bumps of a late-life journey toward sanity.... along with some rants, gripes, sour grapes and good old-fashioned whining from time to time. It's not easy being bipolar in a unipolar world; let's figure it out together.

2 thoughts on “The *New* New Normal

  1. As far as I’m concerned Zyprexa saved my life. Back in 1999 I was so pyschotically manic that I swear I thought my brain was going to melt from overheating. Mania for me is nice, followed by happy, followed by ecstatic, followed by scary crazy, followed by “I can’t see any way this dude is EVER coming back.” The pain at the end is ten times stronger than all the fun at the beginning — so, TOTALLY not worth it.

    It took about three weeks, but the Zyprexa finally brought me back to normal (“normal” after a manic episode means six months of bone crushing depression.)

    There’s no way fat could possibly be worse than the haunts of hell I went through just before they chased me down and dragged me to the hospital.


    1. Your manic episodes sound a lot like mine, except I stop at “scary crazy”…..probably because I’m scared out of my wits, which is when call my p-doc and get my meds tweaked. LOL. I appreciate all he does to keep me OUT of the hospital!


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