Mixed Features

Well, it’s finally happened—I’m in the middle of a good old-fashioned mixed bipolar phase. I’ve been anxious and irritable for weeks, then depression and agitation joined the merry mix about a fortnight ago. The fact that I am currently unstable disappoints the hell out of me…I’d been doing so well for so long that IContinue reading “Mixed Features”

Asking For a Friend…

Has anyone ever noticed that the longer they remain stable, the less serious their illness seems to be? It’s weird. I know I went through a lot in the early years of my bipolar diagnosis, but it all seems like it happened to someone else. I didn’t start this blog till 2013, but I haveContinue reading “Asking For a Friend…”

A Little Bit of Everything

I know, I know, I’ve let too much time pass between blog posts, but life has been in a swirl of randomness and it’s hard to grab onto something solid to talk about. Not to worry, I remain very stable and have made it through the spring without even a hint of hypomania. But theContinue reading “A Little Bit of Everything”

Peace and Quiet

It has occurred to me over this short, mild summer that for the first time since I don’t know when, I haven’t had the slightest inclination toward becoming manic or even hypomanic. I’m calmer on the higher dose of antidepressant, and I have the Klonopin as backup. But I haven’t needed it except for aContinue reading “Peace and Quiet”

A Year of Firsts

It’s been exactly one month since Will passed away. To say this is a difficult day would be an understatement, but I’m facing a whole bunch of them so this first “anniversary” is only the tip of the iceberg. I’ve been warned about this by other widows. There is an entire year of “firsts” to get through—the firstContinue reading “A Year of Firsts”

The Last Visit

Well, the long-dreaded parting with my psychiatrist has finally happened: thanks to my insurance, which will only pay for care received in my county of residence, yesterday was my last visit with Dr. Awesomesauce. And all I can say is I’m thankful I’m not in crisis at this point, because I’m not fond of the idea of getting my mentalContinue reading “The Last Visit”

Gratitude Journal: The Bipolar Edition

Well, this post is a little late for Thanksgiving, but I’m nonetheless thankful for a number of things (and people) I tend to take for granted the rest of the year. Here are a few of them: I’m thankful for stability, which in all the time I’ve been actively battling bipolar disorder, I never thought I’d find.Continue reading “Gratitude Journal: The Bipolar Edition”