Well, it’s finally happened—I’m in the middle of a good old-fashioned mixed bipolar phase. I’ve been anxious and irritable for weeks, then depression and agitation joined the merry mix about a fortnight ago. The fact that I am currently unstable disappoints the hell out of me…I’d been doing so well for so long that IContinue reading “Mixed Features”
Tag Archives: mania
Asking For a Friend…
Has anyone ever noticed that the longer they remain stable, the less serious their illness seems to be? It’s weird. I know I went through a lot in the early years of my bipolar diagnosis, but it all seems like it happened to someone else. I didn’t start this blog till 2013, but I haveContinue reading “Asking For a Friend…”
Etc., Etc., Etc.
A random collection of what’s been going on with me for the past couple of weeks: I managed to sprain my left ankle after Mass last Sunday. I slipped on wet bricks and it was either going to be that or a nasty fall, so in a split-second I decided the ankle had to beContinue reading “Etc., Etc., Etc.”
Peace and Quiet
It has occurred to me over this short, mild summer that for the first time since I don’t know when, I haven’t had the slightest inclination toward becoming manic or even hypomanic. I’m calmer on the higher dose of antidepressant, and I have the Klonopin as backup. But I haven’t needed it except for aContinue reading “Peace and Quiet”
The Eyes Have It
One of the funny/strange things about bipolar disorder is the way people’s eyes change when they’re in a mood episode. Seriously. I can always tell when I’m manic, even when I don’t think so otherwise, because my eyes actually sparkle and change colors. My hazel irises turn green and there’s this slightly mad look inContinue reading “The Eyes Have It”
Just So You Know…
…you can’t reason with someone who is manic. I mean, you can sit there with them and try to rationalize everything, but they don’t know they’re being irrational. They’re sick and have absolutely NO idea they are; in fact, they’ll deny it to the death and become highly offended that you’ve even dared to suggestContinue reading “Just So You Know…”
Silly Season
This is sure one weird spring. Weirder than usual, even. On the inside, my mind and heart are racing, which manifests itself in incessant leg-bouncing and shortness of breath. I don’t show any other signs of mania on the outside, but it’s there, just under the surface, like lava threatening to boil over the sideContinue reading “Silly Season”
Six Years
That’s how long it’s been since I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It’s hard to believe because it seems like I’ve lived the longer part of my life since then, but that’s because I had it for many years before the official label became part of my medical record. I didn’t know it atContinue reading “Six Years”
The Remains of the Day
My son and I finally cleaned out Will’s closet and dresser drawers today. It took me almost 16 months to be ready for this day, but it was definitely time. I’ve been looking at his things and steeling myself for the inevitable. I knew it was going to be hard. As we went through theContinue reading “The Remains of the Day”
Status Report
I’m a bit bored today, so I thought I’d pass it along and give you all an update on how I’m doing. I’m saddened by the loss of a good friend from church. He was my reading partner for two years, and he and Will were also friends as they were both battling cancer. ThisContinue reading “Status Report”
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