guilt – bpnurse

A Fine Mess

And now it begins: The enormity of what I’ve lost, am losing, and am about to lose is beginning to crash in on me, and it’s staggering. My unemployment benefits are running out. I can’t find a “real” job. Will’s Social Security isn’t enough to get us into even a small apartment, ergo, that means we are goingContinue reading “A Fine Mess”

Promises In The Dark

I’ve backslid quite a bit today. Things are coming to a head in my life and I am greatly afraid of where it’s headed. It seems to be in a free-fall that I cannot stop; I’m in a place where life just keeps getting worse, and I keep losing more and more. Maybe not allContinue reading “Promises In The Dark”

The Hangover

You know how I’ve talked about how mania reminds me of my boozing days? Here’s a way in which the tail end of a manic episode mimics waking up the morning after a drinking binge: a delightful phenomenon my good friend Jesse calls the bipolar hangover. I gotta admit it…..I feel like crap. As in exhausted, like I finished aContinue reading “The Hangover”