One of the funny/strange things about bipolar disorder is the way people’s eyes change when they’re in a mood episode. Seriously. I can always tell when I’m manic, even when I don’t think so otherwise, because my eyes actually sparkle and change colors. My hazel irises turn green and there’s this slightly mad look inContinue reading “The Eyes Have It”
Category Archives: Bipolar Me
Work Ethic
Here’s something I haven’t talked about in a long time: my life on Social Security Disability Insurance. Or rather, my life without work. Four years after that spectacular flame-out at my last job, it still blows my mind that my career is over. I was supposed to work till at least age 66—70 if I’dContinue reading “Work Ethic”
Just So You Know…
…you can’t reason with someone who is manic. I mean, you can sit there with them and try to rationalize everything, but they don’t know they’re being irrational. They’re sick and have absolutely NO idea they are; in fact, they’ll deny it to the death and become highly offended that you’ve even dared to suggestContinue reading “Just So You Know…”
A Really Good Day
Well, if there was ever a time to be reminded of the necessity of my continuing existence, yesterday was it. It was one of the BESTEST DAYS EVER! Not only was the weather perfection itself, I got to go to lunch and I heard from different people during the course of the day who madeContinue reading “A Really Good Day”
Curiouser and Curiouser
This spring just gets weirder. I am struggling mightily to stay on my medication and sleep schedules, I feel all racy and overstimulated inside, and NONE of it shows on the surface. Not even my family can tell how scrambled my brains are. In the past, I might have called this a mixed episode, thoughContinue reading “Curiouser and Curiouser”
Shower Power, Revisited
I’m having trouble showering again. What the hell is the problem here? you might ask. Well, if you Google “bipolar disorder and showers”, you’ll find all kinds of information about it—most of it anecdotal to be sure, but it’s a genuine phenomenon that defies rational explanation. It’s most often a symptom of depression, although with me itContinue reading “Shower Power, Revisited”
Silly Season
This is sure one weird spring. Weirder than usual, even. On the inside, my mind and heart are racing, which manifests itself in incessant leg-bouncing and shortness of breath. I don’t show any other signs of mania on the outside, but it’s there, just under the surface, like lava threatening to boil over the sideContinue reading “Silly Season”
World Bipolar Day, March 30, 2018
Since tomorrow is also Good Friday and I’ll be going “off the grid” for the day, I thought I’d mention the fact that the fifth annual World Bipolar Day will be taking place. In past years I’ve discussed the background and general purposes of the celebration, so if you’re a new reader you can alwaysContinue reading “World Bipolar Day, March 30, 2018”
The Springtime Crazies
…have definitely struck. I’m not off the spool, but I’m restless and have all this energy I’m having a hard time channeling, and having just a great time not doing anything! The weather sucks hugely—it’s only 39 degrees and there’s snow mixed in with the rain, but it doesn’t matter, as far as I’m concernedContinue reading “The Springtime Crazies”
In Dreams
Sleep is getting wonky again. Maybe it’s the change of seasons (yay, we’re on Daylight Saving Time again!) or just because my brain likes to shit the bed every now and then. I get enough sleep overall, but I keep waking up several times a night and in between I have some of the strangestContinue reading “In Dreams”
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