A random collection of what’s been going on with me for the past couple of weeks:
- I managed to sprain my left ankle after Mass last Sunday. I slipped on wet bricks and it was either going to be that or a nasty fall, so in a split-second I decided the ankle had to be sacrificed. Now it’s a week later and I’m still limping around, living on Advil and liver-killing doses of Tylenol, and wishing the damn thing would stop hurting. It just wears me out, and I’m sure not gonna make it heal any faster by dragging my sorry carcass to the grocery store and standing/walking on it for half an hour. Big mistake—the next day I could barely walk on it.
- Saw Dr. Goodenough on Tuesday, and for the first time in our three years as doctor and patient, he didn’t have his shit together. He had the wrong patient’s chart pulled up on the computer and began asking me what dose of Prozac and Remeron I was taking. I don’t take either of them. He was, however, appropriately embarrassed and he apologized, and I promptly forgave him. Everybody has a bad day now and again, but I’m glad I’m such a stickler about knowing my meds and diagnoses inside and out. I guess that little adventure known as a nursing career taught me something.
- I am most definitely done with trying to change my medication regimen. I didn’t have even a moment of mania this spring or summer, and the longer I live with this illness of mine the more I realize that I really DON’T want to become manic again. That whole thing about hypomania? Sure, I’d love to have that kind of energy but I definitely don’t want to torpedo my credit rating, get involved in projects I never finish, drive like my hair is on fire and my ass is catching, or wake everybody up by noisily cleaning the kitchen at 3 in the morning. Life may have been a little more exciting back in the day, but I don’t want to change anything because the way I am when I’m not manic is better.
- Mild depression is lurking around the corner. I can feel it softly creeping in sometimes early in the morning, but it’s gone by the afternoon and I go about my business as usual. Besides, I’ve got my HappyLight, and as Dr. G says, we both have phones.
- Speaking of phones: I’ve actually been without one for the past three days and I am in acute withdrawal. For some reason my sweet iPhone Xs Max decided that I shouldn’t make any calls—although I could receive them—and the only solution was to get another phone. So while I’m waiting for the new/reconditioned one to come in, 100 times a day I’ll reach for my phone to text someone, check out Facebook or take a look at my stats here at bpnurse. My fingers literally itch to have it in my hands. I take it with me everywhere, and I mean everywhere, but for now I have to be content with carrying around my phone case and trying not to lose my mind.
So that’s how I’m doing. How about you?