It seems as though several blog posts are swimming around in my head at the same time, so I can’t guarantee how this one will turn out. Maybe I should try combining a couple of them. Here goes:
I’ve noticed a growing restlessness lately that makes me wonder if I should try working again, if only for a little variety (not to mention the dough). There really isn’t much to do here except clean the kitchen and bathroom, and you can only do that so many times in a given week.
Of course, the fact that my online life has been somewhat curtailed doesn’t help, although I manage to stay in touch via phone and tablet. But I do need something to do, and I’m half-tempted to say “aw the hell with it” as far as Social Security is concerned…..
…..at least until I remember that I get the heebie-jeebies just THINKING about working in a fast-paced environment. And aren’t they all fast-paced nowadays? Why do employers seem to be so proud of that—don’t they know that this sort of thing wears most people down? I’ve been there and done that, and I have the doctor bills to prove it. If only there were something I could do that would provide structure without overstimulation!
It’s fun to watch the dogs interact, though. My Zinnie and the landlady’s dog, Rufus, have become good friends—TOO good, actually, as Rufus has been doing his best to make her preggers. The fact that he’s three times her size (and neutered to boot) hasn’t stopped him, or her either for that matter. But she’s just like a pesky little kid who keeps pestering her older sibling to play long after he’s had enough, and last night he got in her face and let out a loud warning bark that scared the bejeebus out of her.
Well, Zin got the message and stayed away from Rufus for the rest of the evening. In fact, she was more subdued than I’ve ever seen her…..he really put her in her place! I hope they kiss and make up sometime soon, though, because it’s hilarious to watch them run around the house, my little dog acting lije a circus monkey trying to ride a bucking bronco. Sometimes she even manages to stay on the whole eight seconds. 🙂
bpnurse 
It is wonderful to read this side of you. Upbeat. Writing of playful dogs. Restless (hopefully healthfully so). Wanting to do something.
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It feels so good after being depressed for so long. I’d almost forgotten what it feels like to be optimistic, which is my default mode when I’m not battling depression. Happy days are here again!
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Brava!
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See if you can’t blog from the library, many places let you use their computers for an hour at a time. Plus there are these things that are called books…?
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If I could read and concentrate on books, I would. That ability went away years ago. I used to be a voracious reader and now I can barely make it through a magazine article. 😦
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that stinks 😦 Well you could still use their computer to do your blogging maybe? and rent dvd’s lol…
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Have you thought about doing some volunteer work? Maybe at a local animal shelter? Then you wouldn’t have problems still qualifying for SSDI. I wouldn’t be able to stay home, either despite my illnesses.
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here’s abook you might like, lol…
by the way! volunteering now might mess up your disability… “Wait on the Lord…” the very hardest thing but do it!!
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Haha!! And I wouldn’t hesitate to wear those colors when I’m manic…..
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I really miss reading your posts everyday. Is there a local library you can go to? I know mine here have computers you can use. It might help you get out of the house with a purpose to do something you love. I feel like it would help you and those of us who are blessed with your writings!
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Thank you for your kind words. <3. Yes, our library does have computers and it would be a good idea to get out regularly to do something constructive. I appreciate your suggestion, and I'm glad you like my blog!
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